Anxiety can be debilitating. It can dang-near destroy you and your mental health from the inside out. But thankfully there are so many ways to get a better handle on it.

Learning how to manage anxiety is sometimes hit and miss, but that’s okay. We experiment with different coping mechanisms to find what really works for us as individuals.

And then we do find a magical antidote that provides us some much-needed relief!

Certain techniques may not completely take our anxiety away, but help significantly. Others might only help a little bit, but each tool we add to our toolbox gets us closer to making our anxiety more manageable.

We can finally breathe at least a little bit better, sometimes much better.

Here are the things I’ve tried that have truly made a difference for me. I really think that you can find some effective strategies for yourself out of this list.

Remember: You’re strong. You can prevail!

Breathe

Learning to actually breathe correctly is like hitting the “reset” button and you can easily do it anytime, anywhere!

Put one hand on your belly and one on your chest and take 5 deep breaths. Focus on breathing with your belly, making sure it’s moving in and out while your chest remains still.

I recently posted an article to help moms turn their day around when they’re struggling, in which I linked a great YouTube video on the technique of box breathing. Go check that article out if you’re a mom who gets totally stressed sometimes! Or you can just view that video here.

Assure Yourself That These Fears Are Not Reality (and chances of them happening are low)

I have always had fears of various tragedies happening to the people I love, but those fears became severe after having my first child. I would scare myself into tears thinking of all of the worst things that could happen.

Incredibly disturbing thoughts would penetrate my mind with no warning. They were terrifying and graphic.

I could hardly convince myself to put my baby down because I pictured all sorts of worst-case-scenarios that I could come back to. I even started having seizure-like symptoms one night from a horribly gruesome image that flashed through my head as I desperately tried to turn these thoughts around.

It. Was. Torture.

Whenever I’m having intrusive thoughts now, I have found that telling myself this one thing is extremely helpful and effective for me.

“That is not happening right now and chances of it ever happening are extremely low.”

This has been a powerful tool. It puts my mind at ease as it helps me realize that these thoughts are not reality. 

Identify The Real Emotion

It’s a really good idea to identify the real emotions behind your anxiety and why you’re feeling them. If you can uncover these emotions, then maybe you can figure out a way to deal with them.

Here’s a list of emotions that you may actually be feeling that are triggering the episode. Refer to it when you can’t quite put your finger on what’s really going on (maybe pin it for later!).

Now Why?

Is this a trauma response? Genetics? Maybe hormone imbalances?

Meeting with a psychologist or counselor could be a big help in identifying what exactly is going on behind the scenes in our brains.

The severity of my anxiety after my babies were born was partly due to genetics, but mainly because of the crazy hormone imbalances that naturally occur after childbirth. This was important for me to recognize because it pointed me in a direction of finding out how to deal with it better until my body calmed down.

After those childbirth hormone levels settled down, I learned what hormones were still out of whack when I met with a naturopath and had bloodwork done. As a result, she was able to suggest supplements and dietary changes to get those hormones back in check, which I was grateful for.

Some of my other anxieties were due to past traumas so I figured that trauma therapy would probably make a huge difference for me in my healing journey. It did.

Tell Yourself That You’re Not Doing This

Sometimes, I still experience anxiety because of an issue that I’ve addressed and truly worked through. It’s not nearly as severe or as often, but it does happen on occasion.

It’s important to make sure you’re not shoving these feelings down when they really do need attention, but as soon as you recognize that this spiral is actually being caused by issues that you’ve already worked through, tell yourself that these thoughts are not productive and that you’re not going down that road right now.

Then redirect to:

  • Everything you can think of that you’re grateful for
  • Everything positive that’s happened today/this week/this month, big or small
  • All the reasons why you love your spouse
  • All the reasons why you love your kids
  • Achievements that you’re proud of
  • Recounting your favorite memory like you’re telling someone a story
  • Positive affirmations
  • Focusing on and counting your breaths
  • Prayer
  • Grounding (5 things you can see, 5 things you hear, feel, smell, and maybe even taste)
  • Distraction, like puzzles. I like to do word-searches to take my mind off of my worries.

Just Get Your Business Done

If you’re like me, you’re a procrastinator! All sorts of tasks, big and small, give me a rush of anxiety that I can physically feel in my chest.

Something, I don’t know what (fear?), had me hesitating to just ask my husband if he’s going to an appointment with me tomorrow! Getting a simple question out in the air should not be a big deal inside my head, but for some reason it is. 

So just get it done. Push yourself to ask the question. Start the conversation that you need to have, even if it’s hard as heck. Reply to that text/email. Bare down and get the dishes done or whatever chore/task is screaming at you. 

You can break it down to bite sized pieces if you have to to make something that’s daunting more manageable. Maybe set a 5 minute timer and try to get as much of it done as you can within that time. I often find that the task is easier than I worked it up to be. Then chip away at it some more a little while later.

Get it done and out of the way so that it can stop haunting you!

Voice Your Fears For Reassurance 

There was a day when I had just left my kids with a babysitter and quickly started fearing the worst about them getting too close to the highway by their house. I didn’t know what to do, so I just straight up called my babysitter and told her that, though it may seem irrational, I just had to talk to her about the fears I was having for my own peace of mind.

I trust her very much. She is already the kind of person who keeps a close eye on the kids, but I needed reassurance that she would go outside with the kids when they went out to play.

I think that identifying a specific thing that I needed her to do for me to put my fears at ease was a significant help in this situation. She was so good to me about it and assured me that she understood and would absolutely do that for me.

Thank goodness for that woman.

There have been other situations when I have started worrying excessively about x, y, or z, but I’ve found that I don’t need to be afraid of just being open and honest with the other people involved about what I’m feeling.

People are actually very likely to be understanding and we can get some much-needed reassurance and we can plan to avoid the outcome(s) we’re afraid of.

The people we love are usually willing to work with us. Just be honest.

Talk

Whenever I tell my husband that I’m struggling with anxiety, the weight tends to lift at least a little bit, even if that’s all I can get out.

Sometimes we’ll talk more in depth about what’s running through my head, sometimes I’ll let go and cry, and sometimes just saying the words out loud and having him sit with me is enough to slow my mind. He understands the crushing weight of anxiety, which really helps.

Find a loved one or close friend who you can trust to just listen to you when you need them to.

It can be astonishingly hard to open up to loved ones about what we’re going through, but you really don’t have to be so afraid. Give them the opportunity to be there for you and support you when you need it.

If you need help getting the confidence you need to talk about your mental state, read my article here.

ASMR

Many people turn to ASMR videos on YouTube to help them manage their anxiety to help them relax and take their minds off of their worries.

If you’ve never heard of ASMR before, here’s a good explanation from Sleep Foundation: 

“Autonomous sensory meridian response (ASMR) describes the deep relaxation and pleasant scalp tingling some people feel in response to quiet sounds such as whispering, or quiet sounds combined with gentle movements and personal attention.”

Find the full article here.

I experience the “tingles” on my scalp. Some people don’t, but that doesn’t stop them from watching as a source of relaxation.

There are an incredible number of different kinds of ASMR videos from people whispering and/or doing hand movements in front of the camera, to no-talking cooking and baking. Explore the different kinds of videos to find what you like best and enjoy! You’re welcome 🙂

Here’s one from a woman I really like who actually suffers from anxiety herself and she made this video specifically for grounding yourself during an anxiety attack.

Prayer

I know and respect that not everybody is religious. That’s okay. But if you believe in any sort of higher power this can still be a powerful tool for you too.

Personally, I believe in a loving God who is near at all times and who I can talk to at any time about anything. This belief and the power of prayer has been huge in my mental health journey.

One night, I was desperately begging this brain of mine to stay on top of the downward spiral. But I was failing.

The thought came to me to pray, so I did, right there as I lay in bed. I didn’t know where exactly I was going with this particular prayer when I started it, but soon, thoughts of all the people in my life flooded my mind. So, instead of praying for me and my trials, I started praying for them. Everyone I could possibly think of, I prayed that they would receive the blessings that they need in their lives at this time.

Soon, I woke up. I had actually fallen asleep! And now it was morning.

I was shocked, as sleeping is simply not possible during the spiral. But here I was, refreshed and my mind was quiet.

Millions of people have had profound, comforting experiences with prayer. If you do believe in God or some higher power, keep this tool in mind for future attacks.

If you’re not sure yet if you believe or not, but are curious and open, just try it. It might feel awkward, but there’s nothing to lose by just trying it out.

CBD

CBD is different from THC and will not give you the intoxicating effects that THC does. THC in high doses can actually make anxiety worse, but CBD on the other hand, has been proven to improve anxiety and general mental health. This is a good read on the subject.

Healthline says that, “Cannabidiol (CBD) is a type of cannabinoid, a chemical found naturally in cannabis (marijuana and hemp) plants. Early research is promising regarding the ability of CBD oil to help relieve anxiety.”

Find the full article here.

I have had incredible results with Fairwinds’ CBD Release tincture and their CBD inhaler while going through debilitating anxiety attacks. I decided to try Fairwinds because it’s a clean and trusted brand, even going above and beyond the Department of Health requirements but do your own research and maybe even meet with a healthcare professional to counsel with and find what’s best for you if you decide to try using CBD to help manage your anxiety.

Wrapping Up

Alright, my friend. There you are. My top practices and resources that I use to manage my anxiety. I hope that this post stirred up some thoughts and ideas that you can implement to manage your own anxiety even better.

Best of luck to you in your journey to mental well-being. Until next time.

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